When There’s No One You Can Talk To

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Can you think of a time in your life when you felt completely alone? I mean, yeah, you have friends that you can call. You even have your group of 3 AM friends that you know will be there for you no matter what. But, sometimes stuff comes up that you feel that you need to figure out all on your own.

“This, too, shall pass.” is a quote I think about often because it’s true time and time again. So, I always think that I need to keep “my stuff” to myself because it might feel differently the next day, may even be sorted out by the next day. And, if I share it then that person will remember it probably until we have another conversation, sometimes even longer. Worse yet, it may cause the other person to form opinions about what should and shouldn’t happen next, opinions about others involved that might not be completely fair because of the bias of the given situation.

This can be a very lonely place. I’ve not figured out a way to work through this part of my life quite yet. How to be okay just working through my problems, my feelings, my hopes and dreams – alone.

I’m a collaborator. I make things happen. I’m your biggest champion, your cheerleader, the one who can manage the details of a big idea, work on a team. When it comes to my own dreams, my own ideas, things I want to build – hmmm, honestly sometimes I can feel lost. Am I seeking permission?

Permission is a word that keeps coming up over and over in my recent conversations with mentors, role models and friends. Permission must be tied together with self worth in some way. It’s my job to keep poking and picking at the uncomfortable spot until I no longer need permission or affirmations from anyone to pursue my dreams. I have a deep desire to make a difference in the lives of kids who don’t have a strong foundation of self confidence. I sometimes wonder how I can help them if I don’t have that myself?

Maybe like we all do – we just become vulnerable and learn along with them. I invite you to do the same.

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